I realized I have been using realizations as justifications. For example, if I felt I ‘had to’ or ‘should’ do something I would think, no I don’t, there is no requirement or having to do something, which then becomes a justification to not do whatever I felt I ‘had to’ do. No, it doesn’t matter and isn’t necessary to do anything. Common sense. if it was ‘required’ or ‘had to’ be done, then it would be done, no choice about it, so no, nothing is inherently ‘required’. Breathing is required -to live- yes, but it’s not just simply required period. Otherwise it would never stop, it would always happen. So ‘Requiredness’ in the concept itself existing in itself doesn’t make sense. I had separated myself from this word and was using it/defining it as a thing of itself.
I am/have realized this about many many words, this separation. In a way like some forms of math are only valid within a ‘Euclidian’ space that exists separate from reality/existence itself.