Archive for August, 2010

From Russia Without Love

I have recently ‘jumped’ back into learning Russian. This is something that I started to do several years ago,  gee, maybe 6-7 years ago, I just did it as a hobby. I really wanted ‘to know’ Russian, to be able to speak it, but this did not necessarily translate to ‘wanting to do what is required to be able to speak Russian’, haha. I just wanted to be able to speak it, but of course things don’t work that way in this reality of space and time, outflow and consequence.

So, I started back into learning Russian when I came across a site called Livemocha which if a place for people who want to learn a language to go and they have little exercises you can do to help you learn, and then those exercises will be checked by other users just like you. And likewise you can check other people’s exercises for them. If you do enough checking people’s exercises you can have access to all the lessons you would like to learn. This is just like the idea proposed for the Equal Money System of having possibly a 4-year conscription where everyone will contribute 4 years of labor to the system which supports us, our ‘life support system’ you could call it, the system thru which we create, produce, distribute such things that are essential to have a decent life here in and as the physical, like food, shelter, water, health care, electricity, transportation. Just 4 years! Instead of spending one’s whole life slaving away, trying to hoard enough to be able to be supported when one is unable to work anymore, because support is simply not guaranteed, one must constantly prostitute themself just to ‘earn’ the right to live- what bullshit. Anyway- the language learning site is just like the conscrption concept, once you put in a little labor, you then have unconditional access. Very cool to see an example of that in action. And also seeing the point of equality, wherein when assisting others by checking their exercises, doing so from the principle of what/how would I like to be assisted?

So, it was on this site that I met up with someone (virtually) who speaks Russian and is learning English, and we have been working together as ‘pen-pals’ or rather ‘skype-pals’, assisting each other to learn the respective languages. Within our learning together, I have been seeing how I have not really been putting in the necessary effort to actually learn the language, and have been basically just repeating things, hoping somehow I will just one day suddenly, magically know Russian and speak it fluently. What I have realized and am really seeing first-hand, is that I have to really do the actual work- I have to put in to get out, because I will only get out what I put in. It’s not a difficult or foreign concept- I have realized this in many other ‘areas’ or contexts, but what is fascinating is that I actually had a desire to learn/speak/know Russian- and yet hadn’t faced the point of actually doing the work- this shows just how Irrelevant a Desire is. Completely irrelevant to reality- why bother ‘wanting’ something- if you actually really ‘wanted’ it you busy yourself with doing it, not spending your time wishing/wanting/hoping.

So this is a really cool point that has opened up for me, to push myself to do the actual labor, which has not been easy, because I had established patterns, which I am still working thru, which ‘get in the way’ or act as ‘distractions’ from doing the work, and taking the time to simply be here and do it. As I have been pushing thru this, pushing thru and deleting these resistances and mental blockages I am finding that what I am learning, well, it is really ‘sticking’ I would say, meaning that since I am being here when learning and not distracted by my mind, I really get a clear, practical, effective understanding of the information, as opposed to just trying to ‘memorize and hope it sticks’. And since I have really started actually applying myself, I am actually progressing in my ability to understand/speak Russian, i.e. ‘it’s actually starting to make sense now’.

Assisting another to learn English is fascinatingly supportive as well- as it has assisted me to see/remember what it took for me to be able to speak a language fluently- it took years and years of learning the rules, going over it, bit by bit, step by step, really learning how it works, and practicing every day, and testing it out with others for feedback. I had forgotten/taken for granted just what it took- I could barely recall simple rules or terms of English grammar, because I do not need to know them anymore, it is so programmed in I can just speak practically automatically, practically unaware of the processes going on within speaking/forming communication. It is really fascinating what comes up when you have someone who is not totally ingrained with the language program, but is ingrained with another- it really provides some fascinating perspective on one’s ingrained language, and on language in general, and who we are within our languages. And when it comes down to it, we are really pretty much all saying the same shit, lol. It’s just different words/sounds to describe what is here- well, predominantly, our limited and confused perspective of what’s here, anyway. It’s about time a point like Desteni opened up in existence, finally a point who is standing up to stop the bullshit, to stop the bullshit in themselves to show by example that it can be done, we can clear things up and actually see what is really going on here in this existence.


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DeFragging my Life

Lately, well maybe for a few months now, I have undertaken the task of cleaning out my house, as it is full of stuff that is not used and is just taking up space. Things that have been collected over time, the products of the various systems of reasoning in my mind, as to what to keep around and why. The kind of mentality that leads to not simply being practical about what to keep around and what not.

I noticed this is much like defragging my computer where you take all the scattered fragments and put them in order so they are easier to access, and thus you can function more effectively and efficiently. I am like a cell, processing, absorbing, sorting, excreting, lol, and I have expanded to the larger cell of my house and now act as that entire cell, processing, excreting,  moving, etc, as the entire cell of the house as one cell, one organism in itself. haha. It’s cool to stand as this point and direct myself within what is practical, and not feeling/being trapped/directed by the old patterns which led to ineffectiveness manifested in disorganization and clutter. To see that I can be practical here, is so cool.

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