I am in an interesting position which is that I have a long commute to and from work, I travel across about 50 miles (so it’s about 100 miles round-trip) and since taking the big highway costs over $5 a day, most of the time I take alternate routes which are free but take longer, even though it’s less miles but you can’t go as fast as on the big highway. So throughout my journey I pass thru several counties, many towns, and from one state to another.

For the first few years of doing this commute I just paid the tolls and took the big highway, trying to ‘save as much time as possible’ and didn’t consider whether there might be another way because I wasn’t really that experienced with the roads/areas and just kind of going on assumptions and impressions I got from one of my coworkers who I used to carpool with before I had gotten my own car who also lived in the same house as me. I was in a ‘subservient’ position I guess you can call it, where I was like ‘under a spell’ of accepted self-belief thru which I extremely limited myself. Where I basically defined myself as ‘having no right’- having no right to think or speak about or effect in any way or direct in anyway, the point of commuting, while I was not a car owner myself, and thus simply a ‘dependant’ on the other person. And I used my inexperience with driving/navigation as another point to justify self-limitation, wherein I ‘didn’t see myself’ as ‘having anything to say’ or ‘being able to contribute’ in any way to the commuting ‘process’ in terms of, for example, deciding/considering which way to go- this point was only in the ‘power’ of the other within them being the owner of the car and them being older and thus ‘having more experience’ and I hadn’t had a car for several years, maybe five or so years, and my previous driving experience, when I did have a car or had access to a car, was not ‘extensive’. It was thru these points that I ‘told myself’ I had no right/ability to contribute in any way, other than simply doing the simple point of sharing the basic labor of the driving itself. So within this point I was basically completely suppressed, completely suppressing myself from being here and being able to have any directive effect on my world. I also used this point of ‘dependence’ as a point to ‘inferiorize’ myself, so to speak, wherein I would judge myself for my inequal position compared to my coworker who did have a car, and I see now how I was the one creating that point, that whole point of polarity of inferiority/superiority, wherein- I felt/perceived myself to be inferior because I perceived the other to be superior- I was literally placing them in a position of ‘superiority’ wherein I had ‘given’ them ‘all the power’, all the ‘authority’, all the ‘ability’, to direct the point of commuting, and thus this of course resulted in me feeling ‘powerless’, and ‘having no right’ or ability, because that is what I had literally done to myself, I had literally ‘decided’ in my mind that in this situation for such and such reasons, I ‘cannot’ direct and ‘have no power/ability’. What a fuck-up.

The build-up and compounding of this point, these feelings, pushed me into getting a car, I was literally ‘desperate’ to get a car, to be ‘able’ to ‘take back’ this this point of direction, and I eventually did. And the first few years I basically continued jst I had when I had been carpooling- going the same way, out of an assumption of ‘it must be the best way’ since that person who I placed as ‘more than me’ seemed to think this was the best way, therefore ‘who am I to challenge/question that’. And even some conversations had come up about a different route to take and they had expressed they don’t think it’s practical to go that way because it takes longer, and I just sort of blindly accepted this justification, like ‘of course you wouldn’t want it to take longer’.

Which leads me to an interesting ‘mathematical’ point I have realized- within the context of mathematically trying to ‘work-out’ what is the ‘best/most effective’ option in regards to ‘spending time’, wherein there is an equation which is used which is the “Time = Money” equation. Wherein, this equation is used for determining ‘how much’ in terms of ‘imcome/money’ a certain period of time is worth- for example when calculating between say, two different ways to commute to work, and one way takes 1 hour and costs $5 in tolls, and the 2nd way takes 1 hour and 20 mins but costs no tolls- then you work out according to how much you earn at your job per hour, how much ’20 mins’ is worth- so, for example, say you earn $12/hr, then 20 mins = $4, so then, according to this math you would then reason that the 1st way ‘costs’ 1 hour of time plus $5, and the 2nd way ‘costs’ 1 hour of time plus ‘$4’- therefore the 2nd way is better to go.

However, the equation is not complete. There is a point that is missed, which is that you cannot work ‘unlimited’ time- there is a limit to how many hours you are able to work, whether it is how much you can physically do, or how many hours are available at your job to work, or how many hours they are willing to pay you for, there is a limit, so it is erroneous to simply ‘count/value’ all your time spent in terms of how much you ‘could be making’ if it was time spent working at your job, because there is actually only a limited amount of time you can spend working. So, how this math falls short, if this point is not considered, is where, for example, taking the same example above but with different figures- if the 1st route is 1 hour and $5 tolls, and the 2nd route is 1 hour and 45 mins- now the second way ‘costs’ 1 hour plus ‘$7.50’, therefore the 1st way is apparently ‘better’- however, in actual reality and not just some crazy hypothetical-math-terms, when you consider there is a finite limit to the money you can make, then- the 1st way is costing you $5 and the 2nd way is costing you NONE. It doesn’t matter how much you ‘could hypothetically make’ in that ‘amount of time’ that the 2nd route takes beyond the 1st route, because there is only a finite amount you can make, period. Considering that, then it just might make more sense to opt for the ways that don’t cost money so that you can use more of the Finite amount you Can get for more effective things.

Anyway, to ‘top this off’, basically the point is, don’t ‘get lost’ in some mental calculating system which doesn’t Consider ALL Points. Unless ALL points is Considered- the Calculations is Invalid.

Ok, this is just some points that have come up thru this point of the commuting I do, there will surely be more to come

## It’s A Long Way but

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